Deena Chapter 7

I knocked on Natalie's door.
When she opened it, i couldnt help but burst into tears. I left my house as soon as my mum told me my dads name and ran straight to natalies.
"Babes whats wrong?", she said letting me in.
natalies dad walked out of the kitchen, "deena are u ok?", he asked.
i shook my head, "nats bring her into the front room- ill make her some warm milk"
it was around 10 in the morning now.
"deena what happend."
i put my head in natalies lap as her dad brought in the warm milk. i thanked him.
"my mum told me dad lives in finsbury park and that hes been sending money since i was a baby but shes been keeping it."
Natalie looked to her dad who was wearin nuffin by a towel like he had just come out of the shower. i was hopin some of his sweat had falle into my milk.
"im so sorry deena- did she tell you his name?", he asked sitting down.
"yeah," i said, "its an iranian name- ive forgotten it."

"she probably did it to protect you- what kind of man leaves a woman alone with her baby after HE got her pregnant- he probably doesnt care," natalie said.

"because SHE never gave him the chance," i cried. "i wanna meet him."

natalies dad looked at me, "deena- im not sure if thats a good idea- your mum may have hurt you but im sure she had her reasons- listen why dont u go upstairs- shower and have a lie down and after uve rested you can make a proper decision then, i didnt know my dad and when i finally met him last year it was the biggest mistake of my life- he didnt care about me or my mum."
i nodded.
"you know where everything is yeah?", natalie asked as i walked upstairs.
i nodded.
i walked into natalie's bathroom and looked in the mirror. my iranian features looked so much more clearer now- i could proper see it in the shape of my eyes and my lips and the texture of my hair.
i got in the shower and let the water rinse me down. it was so warm- it was like it washing the cold from outside off of me.
i got out of the shower, wrapped one of natalies towels around my chest and walked into her room, i used her cocoa butter and make up and then i put on her jeggins and a tight white vest top and went back downstairs.

"my dads gone to pick up his girlfriend's sons from school- theyre both feeling sick," natalie said as i walked into the kitchen, she was doing the washing up.
"are they coming back here?", i asked.
"no- theyre going back to his girlfriends house- deena are u ok?".
I nodded.
" u still wanna go meet ur dad," she asked.
i nodded.
"do u have his adress?".
I nodded, "i took my mums adress book before i left- i left it in the living room- ill go get it." i got the adress book and went back to the kitchen.
"its a house in finsbury park- can we go?".
natalie nodded, "ur my girl man- im not gonna let u go alone."
suddenly i thought of fumez and ryan, natalie was being there and supporting me and i was fuckin with the guys who raped her.
" are u ok- after uno," i asked.
she nodded, "they havent been botherin me so boi i never hve to see them agen." then i saw a tear roll down her eye and she said, "i thrt they were gonna kill me."

I looked at her and had to hold back my tears.
"ur the best friend ive ever had deena- i dont know what i would do if me and u had beef," she said.
then i hugged her and said, "i have the number for my dad's house- im gonna call it and see if hes home- ill say im calling from the council or something."
natalie nodded

i put on my white voice, dried my eyes and dialled the number from my mums adress book, as the fone was rining i was bare nervous.
"hello."
i was silent and then i stuttered, "hello is mr Zarindast there please."
"Speaking."
I had to hold back my tears.
"This is Jane Doe from BT- do you know that you are eligible for free calls to the middle east every night at 6pm."
"what did you say?", he said with excitement.
"Would you like us to come and install it today sir."
"How much extra will i be paying."
"Nothing at all sir."
there was a long silence and then he said, "alright, but im going out within the next three hours so you have to come around as soon as possible."
"Thankyou." I put the phone down and started crying. He sounded like a man version of me.
Natalie hugged me, "was it him?".
i nodded.
"we have to go now," i said, "but u cant come inside with me."
"its kl- ill just wait in the mcdonalds- theres one near the adress."
I nodded.

I put on Natalie's dolly shoes and tinted my eyebrows darker so id look more iranian- so hed want me to more when he saw me and then i brushed my hair. I put on her boyfriend blazer and borrowed her clutch bag, she got changed in to a similar ting and we made our way.

When we got to finsbury park station, we spent ages looking for the road and then we had to ask some homeless man where it was and then he pointed to a road with huge houses.
natalie wished me luck and we agreed to meet in mcdonalds.
i walked onto the road by myself. it was bare quiet and then i found the house.
I prayed for the first time in years that my dad would want me and that he would accept me and then i walked up the front porch and knocked.
the door opened.
i almost collapsed. It was the guy. The guy who had chirpsed me on the bus when those dark skinned bitches were tryna come for me.
"deena?", he said.
i was stunned.
"what are you doing here?".
"you live here?", i asked.
"nah this is my uncles house- come in."
i slowly walked in to the house.
"wait- did u follow me here?", he asked.
"no no," i said, "erm whats your uncles name?".
"why?", he asked.
"faisani its important- whats his name?"
"Akbar," he said, "Akbar Zarindast".