http://andhernamewassaisha.blogspot.com
SKET DUALITY- PAULA VS SAISHA
SORCHA
"There's One Thing You Should Know About Me Sorcha, I'll get Sweeney Todd on a bosh If I Have to"
Wednesday, 7 July 2010
Thursday, 27 May 2010
DEENA SKET FINALE CHAPTER 70
When i woke up i was in the house and there were lights everywhere, i could hear distant sirens and then I looked up and my vision got clearer and there was someone standin over me.
"Can you hear me,".
I felt like i was swimmin, i slowly turned my head and i saw Ryans dad lyin on his back covered in blood. I started cryin and then i heard someone say, "shes alive,".
I dont remember what happened next, i jus remember bare lights and me swimmin and then bein lifted up and me not bein able to move my head.
All i could hear were faint voices and like i felt that i was half asleep.
I just remember a tear rollin down my left eye.
Then i remember bein in a bed and then fallin asleep.
"Deena," I woke up.
There was a doctor standin next to me, "Deena how do you feel."
My entire body was in pain.
"Deena, my name is Dr.Cox, I operated on you yesterday,"
"Operated?".
"You were shot Deena- we were able to remove the bullet but-"
I started cryin, "I was shot?".
"Deena, the police want to talk you, did you see who shot you," he asked.
I cried and just cried, "what about-"
"The man in the house was also shot- he's in a stable condition- Deena did u see who shot u,"
I cried.
"No," i said.
"Deena someone's here to see you," he said.
I cried.
The Dr left the room.
Rochelle walked in and sat next to the bed.
I looked at her and cried, she stroked my face with the back of her hand, i couldnt even say anyfin.
"Dr Cox told u what happened to you yeah?", she asked.
I cried.
"Deena who did this," she asked.
"I dont know," i sobbed, "i didnt see anythin,"
My legs were in a cast.
"Why are my legs in a cast," i asked.
She looked and said, "Deena- they dont know if ull walk again."
I turned my head and started sobbin.
I just cried, she kept sayin "its gonna be ok, its gonna be ok,"
"They might need to perform an operation on you-" she said, "and you might lose a lot of blood and so they've found someone with your blood type just in case you need blood."
"Get out," i said. I couldnt feel anythin in my legs. They were jus numb.
"Why are u even here," i screamd, "u hate me!".
"I dont hate u Deena- im here to help u," she said.
"I dontneed ur help- I just need ryan," i said cryin, i sobbed so hard.
"Deena," she said, "You might not walk again and you need to understand that no matter what happens to you you need to be strong,you need to carry on tough ok,"
"Get out!", i screamed.
"NO!", she shouted back, "im not leavin u here like this."
I looked at her and started cryin, i felt empty and lost.
"Deena, the feds are gonna come in here and talk 2 u about protection," she said.
"protection," i said tryin my best not to cry when i realized that i felt absolutely nothin in my leg.
"Whoever tried to shoot u might try again," she said.
"Who- who shot me Rochelle?", i wept, she hugged me and i wept so hard i felt like my insides were gonna fall out of my eyes, uno them hard cries like where ur whole body shakes.
"Deena, im gonna go see Dr.Cox about gettin in contact with your nan ok, ill be righ back," she said.
Then she left.
And when i was alone, for the first time in my life I prayed and i prayed that If God would give me another chance, I would change and do better and that i would- i started cryin as i closed my eyes to finish my prayer, then someone came in and closed the door.
I looked up.
They locked the door and looked at me, we were look at each other.
And then i knew it, "You did dis, you shot me, how did u get out! how did u get here, how the fuck did u get out."
They looked fumin. Then they pulled out a strap.
"Im doin this for Ryan."
"Please no," i cried.
"Scream and ill shoot straight away," they said.
"Why would u do dis," i cried, "why would u shoot me."
They didnt say anythin and then held the gun up and said, "I saw our mum today for the first time,"
And then I knew it.
"No no," i said, "nah nah it aint- it aint u- it cant be u- u cant be-"
"That's right Deena, the baby in the picture was me."
"YOU FUCKIN BASTARD!", I screamed.
Then he aimed at me and pulled the trigger.
"That's Olefumi to you."
http://andhernamewassaisha.blogspot.com/2010/09/chapter-1-part-one.html
"Can you hear me,".
I felt like i was swimmin, i slowly turned my head and i saw Ryans dad lyin on his back covered in blood. I started cryin and then i heard someone say, "shes alive,".
I dont remember what happened next, i jus remember bare lights and me swimmin and then bein lifted up and me not bein able to move my head.
All i could hear were faint voices and like i felt that i was half asleep.
I just remember a tear rollin down my left eye.
Then i remember bein in a bed and then fallin asleep.
"Deena," I woke up.
There was a doctor standin next to me, "Deena how do you feel."
My entire body was in pain.
"Deena, my name is Dr.Cox, I operated on you yesterday,"
"Operated?".
"You were shot Deena- we were able to remove the bullet but-"
I started cryin, "I was shot?".
"Deena, the police want to talk you, did you see who shot you," he asked.
I cried and just cried, "what about-"
"The man in the house was also shot- he's in a stable condition- Deena did u see who shot u,"
I cried.
"No," i said.
"Deena someone's here to see you," he said.
I cried.
The Dr left the room.
Rochelle walked in and sat next to the bed.
I looked at her and cried, she stroked my face with the back of her hand, i couldnt even say anyfin.
"Dr Cox told u what happened to you yeah?", she asked.
I cried.
"Deena who did this," she asked.
"I dont know," i sobbed, "i didnt see anythin,"
My legs were in a cast.
"Why are my legs in a cast," i asked.
She looked and said, "Deena- they dont know if ull walk again."
I turned my head and started sobbin.
I just cried, she kept sayin "its gonna be ok, its gonna be ok,"
"They might need to perform an operation on you-" she said, "and you might lose a lot of blood and so they've found someone with your blood type just in case you need blood."
"Get out," i said. I couldnt feel anythin in my legs. They were jus numb.
"Why are u even here," i screamd, "u hate me!".
"I dont hate u Deena- im here to help u," she said.
"I dontneed ur help- I just need ryan," i said cryin, i sobbed so hard.
"Deena," she said, "You might not walk again and you need to understand that no matter what happens to you you need to be strong,you need to carry on tough ok,"
"Get out!", i screamed.
"NO!", she shouted back, "im not leavin u here like this."
I looked at her and started cryin, i felt empty and lost.
"Deena, the feds are gonna come in here and talk 2 u about protection," she said.
"protection," i said tryin my best not to cry when i realized that i felt absolutely nothin in my leg.
"Whoever tried to shoot u might try again," she said.
"Who- who shot me Rochelle?", i wept, she hugged me and i wept so hard i felt like my insides were gonna fall out of my eyes, uno them hard cries like where ur whole body shakes.
"Deena, im gonna go see Dr.Cox about gettin in contact with your nan ok, ill be righ back," she said.
Then she left.
And when i was alone, for the first time in my life I prayed and i prayed that If God would give me another chance, I would change and do better and that i would- i started cryin as i closed my eyes to finish my prayer, then someone came in and closed the door.
I looked up.
They locked the door and looked at me, we were look at each other.
And then i knew it, "You did dis, you shot me, how did u get out! how did u get here, how the fuck did u get out."
They looked fumin. Then they pulled out a strap.
"Im doin this for Ryan."
"Please no," i cried.
"Scream and ill shoot straight away," they said.
"Why would u do dis," i cried, "why would u shoot me."
They didnt say anythin and then held the gun up and said, "I saw our mum today for the first time,"
And then I knew it.
"No no," i said, "nah nah it aint- it aint u- it cant be u- u cant be-"
"That's right Deena, the baby in the picture was me."
"YOU FUCKIN BASTARD!", I screamed.
Then he aimed at me and pulled the trigger.
"That's Olefumi to you."
http://andhernamewassaisha.blogspot.com/2010/09/chapter-1-part-one.html
DEENA SKET FINALE (68 PART 2, 69)
68 PART 2
He pulled the trigger.
I screamed as Sorcha hit the ground. Damon laughed.
"Its empty u bosh, where's my money," he said.
Sorcha got up cryin.
"Deena leave," he said, "before man decides to take u back with me."
I looked at Sorcha and kissed my teeth and then suttin hit me, how did she know about the business with my sister. I made my way to leave the room but as i did Damon grabbed me by my waist and said, "wait,"
He kissed my neck.
"Aint you goin Ryans funeral?", he askd me.
I shook my head.
"You know he was a gay bosh yeah?", he said, "he used to get lined up by old white breddas in soho for 2 bags a week,"
I looked at Sorcha, she looked away from me.
"You didnt know?", Damon laughed, "why u fink he set up Diane, she wanted a piece of that dough and he werent givin her none so she started runnin her mouf,"
I looked up at him, "please let me go," i said.
"Sorcha wheres my money," he asked her.
She pointed to bag, "you were gonna run wiv it," he laufed.
He picked up the bag and said, "alright girls ill be on my-" then he looked at my tits and licked them, "you know what," he said, "i dont feel like goin."
I looked at Sorcha, "Us three are gonna fuck, and if anyones got a problem wiv it man might just have to take out my real stap and delegate a few bullets in your pussies."
"Please no," i said.
"Sorcha come ere,"he said.
He was sexy, but my body was still numb, my pussy had stopped hurtin but i was still upset about everythin. Sorcha walked toward us.
"Lips her,"
I looked at him and said, "no please,"
I was so shocked about what i had just found out about Ryan that my whole mind was a mess.
"Lips her,"
Sorcha slowly grabbed my face and kissed me.
At first if felt weird but then my pussy got wet and then i started rollin my tongue around her mouth as we rubbed tits togehter, i was jus doin dis so Damon would leave me alone, the second i had the oppurtunity i was gonna duss.
"lets go the room," damon said.
I looked at Sorcha, she was cryin, she had nuthin, no money, no passport, no ticket to france, no adam. The three of us went up into the room.
As we walked in, i noticed the key to Sorcha's room on the floor, i slyly acted like i had to scratch my foot, i put the key in my jeans pocket.
he lay on sorchas bed.
"ur both gonna suck my dick,"
He pulled off his jeans, took off his ed hardy tshirt and pulled down his boxers. His dick was harder than a day in Wiley's career. Sorcha looked at me as if to say play along so I did, we both took off ourclothes , my tits were still in pain as me and sorcha leaned over the dick and started lips with the dick in between our mouths.
We were both lipsin the dick, my mouth was over the dick and sorchas tongue was runnin up and down the dick as damon squeezed both our asses.
I was so horny, it felt bare wrong, i sucked the dick so hard, he was playin with my pussy, it felt kind of nice to have soft hands there, i was tryin to block out the image of all the tings i had seen, what happened to me at that party, the whole shit with smurkz and then ryan and then icey, all of it.
Damons eys were closed and then he'd open them for a bit like he couldnt believe it was really happenin, Sorcha licked my lips and pulled the dick out of my mouth, she sucked it for a bit and then held it to my lips, i sucked it whilst she was holdin it in her hand.
The dick tasted so clean, i didnt wanna stop suckin it, i was getting lightheaded as i sucked it, my pussy started gettin so moist then it made that sound whenever my thighs rubbed together, Sorcha started bashin him off into my mouth. I sucked the top, licked the tip and then slowly deepthroated it, his body tightened up and he clenched his fists.
"AAAAAAAH," he camein my mouth.
Sticky.
When i opened my mouth his cum ran down my lips, Sorcha leaned over and kissed me sucking the cum out of my mouth, lickin it off my lips.
Then as she did it, I said, "you lot wait here, lemme go take a piss and ill be right back."
Sorcha tried to come with me but damon said, "nah i dont trust u sorcha- ull try and run ,"
I put on my clothes and left the room, i shut the door behind me an dkissed my teeth, I locked those fuckers in.
I heard Damon bangin at the door tellin me to unlock it, I ran to the toilet, flushed the key and left the house.
I didnt even know what i was gonna do, where i was gonna go and then somethin hit me, I needed to find out who my sister was, I needed to go back to the Church to see the Priest.
I walked to the church and when I got there, I couldnt believe it. They were havin a funeral.
Ryans funeral.
Chapter 69
I couldnt believe it, people were leavin and goin into the cars, I saw Sorcha's mum and she walked up to me and hugged me, "Oh deena, you're too late, he's already been cremated."
I looked at her, "cremated?". And then something hit me, Diane and Ryans baby had no parents, Diane and Ryan were dead. I started cryin a bit.
She started cryin and got into acar and then I saw Paula with her mum, she looked at me and turned away. Then i saw the Priest, i had to talk to him, i walked into the empty chair to follow him, i followed him down the stairs which led to the church hall but then i lost him, there was bare mess, i think everyone was on their way to ryans parents house, i was crying and then i saw two people rush into the toilets.
I walked into the toilets, it was a proper big church, the toilets were like the ones in school.
I walked into the toilet to see who it was, there were two people in the cubicle and i recognised one of the voices. I went into the cubicle next to it and pressed my ear to the other cubicle. It was two people- fuckin.
Then i knew who one of the people was, it was Ryans dad.
He was bangin someone, and then he said suttin, "What did the Bible Basherwant to talk to you about, is it about what you know about Deena,"
And just as the person was gonna reply, i think ryans dad phone rang and then i heard him the cubicle and rush out of the toilets and then the prson he was with left too.
Who was he with? And what did that person know about me.
I walked out of the toilets to see what i could see and then all i saw was the Priest walkin into the hall dryin his eyes.
I walke dto him.
He looked at me
"Deena,"
"I need to know somethin,"i said.
"Deena this isn the place, ive just had to conduct a funeral for a young lad,".
"Its about the picture u gave me," i said, "how do u knw the baby was a girl?".
"Because it was wearin pink and the name of course."
OMFG. WHY DIDNT I THINK OF THAT BEFORE- If i just asked him for the name that he christend, it would help me find out who my sister was.
"Well, it was an African name, it sounded feminine," the priest said. "ive forgotten what it was,"
"Dont u keep it in record," i asked.
"Deena," he said, "you need to let this go, you dont need all this pressure and upsetness, ve just had to cremate a boy who was stabbed by a thug with no morals, lifes too short to worry about silly things."
"ITS NOT SILLY!," i screamed, "I need to KNOW who my sister is."
"The best person you can speak to is your mother," he said, "she'll have your answers."
He looked at me like he felt sorry for me, I told him to suck out and then I left.
I was so upset, I just started cryin because I realized how fucked up shit was. Ryan.
There were pictures of him all around the church from when he was little, in his uniform, playin football and that.
I left the church and then i saw Ryans dad in the car park withhis head on the wheel cryn.
I knocked on the car window, he looked up at me and rolled down the windows.
"Can i get in," i said.
he didnt say anythin and he opened the car door for me.
I got in and looked at him, he looked an older Ryan and a bit like Sorcha.
"Im sorry," i said, "about ryan."
He started bawlin, "I fucked up with him, i really fucked up,"
I rested my hand on his knee, "lets go somewhere private," i said.
He looked at me and put the key in the ignition and drove out of the car park.
We were headin to East
"Why did u have the funeral in south london," i asked.
"My aunt Shirley's friend Ethel arranges the flowers for the Church and so she helped arrange it," he said cryin.
I didnt even know why i was in his car but i felt safe with him, he was proper big, like he looked like griminal if he was 35 and was on weights.
We got to some house.
"Wheres everyone else," i asked.
"My aunt Shirleys in Brixton, they wont care about where i am- everyones thinkin the same thing,".
"what," i asked.
"that its my fault he's dead," he said, "that if i had been there for him as his dad he wouldnt have gotten into this mess."
I felt so guilty, i wanted to tell him what I knew but i need suttin from him and i knew how i was gonna get it.
We walked into the house.
It was so big, but it was dirty.
He was in a black suit.
"You wanna drink?", he asked.
I shook my head, he walked into the kitchen and came out with what looked like Rum.
"You're a nice girl Deena- what were u doin with a boy like ryan," he asked sippin his glass.
"I loved him," i said.
He sniggered, "Youts talkin about love."
I didnt say anythin and then he said, "im sorry- listen take a seat."
I sat down, i couldnt believe this was sorchas uncle, paulas dad, ryans dad, michelles uncle, the man rochelle grew up believin was her uncle. He was big, his shirt was off now, he was startin to remind me of natalies dad.
"I know your mum," he said sippin his rum.
"You do?", i asked.
He smiled and said, "your mum was my first,".
I froze.
"Your mum could suck dick like her life depended on it- i know tings about ur mum that u dont,"
I wanted to cry but i said, "where did u meet her,"
"Party- 1988, we were both 14, i didnt even know who she was and i fucked the shit out of her in your grandmothers bed,".
He was drunk but i could tell he wasnt lyin, "you know how i found out ryan was fuckin with u?", he asked, "Sorcha, she knew i used to fuck wit ur mudda, i tell sorcha everythin."
He was soundin like he was five, "this house- is where i came when i left ryans mum, i used to fuck so much pussy on this couch, whilst ryan was bein the man of the house lookin after his mum and sister and here i was, fuckin pussy like my life depended on it," he started cryin and then he said, "ryan my boy."
"The police dont care about who killed him cos he was in trouble with them himself apparently, so they just see it as black on black i dont see it like that- i see him as my son," he was screamin and cryin now.
"You know somethin about me," i said.
He looked at me and froze, "i heard you tell someone today that- the person knows somethin about me and you do too."
"Come ere," he said.
I looked at him for a bit and got up slowly, i walked over to him.
He touched my tit with the back of his hand, "be nice to me," he slurred, "and ill tell you what your mum told me."
I kissed him, he tasted of ryan.
I kissed his neck. ryan.
the hands. ryan.
the chest. ryan.
the dick. ryan.
I cried as he flipped me on my back and pulled off my clothes, in my head it was ryan, i held onto him so tight, i felt his dick against my pussy, his tongue against my neck. Ryan.
It was Ryan fuckin my wet cunt, it was ryans dick slidin in and out of me lickin my neck. It was Ryans who hench body was on top of mine givin me the bang, his thick dick strokin every inch of my throbbin pussy, every inch of it in me, "Ryan."
I scratched his back and blew in his hear, he fucked me even harder. Ryan, ryan all over again on top of me, dick in my pussy, tongue in my mouth.
"AAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAAAA RYAN!".
I trembled and came.
I cried out with my hands wrapped around Ryans neck and then he spoke, and it wasnt Ryan, it was his dad and i started cryin again.
His dad got off of me and fell on his back, we were on the floor lyin next to each other pantin.
"You're not your mums first born," he slurred.
"Who is it," i asked.
"I dont know," he said.
"You do," i cried, "please tell me, i know who killed Ryan, tell me and il tell you."
He slowly got up and said, "YOU WHAT."
I jumped up and said, "i know who killed ryan, tell me who my-" He punched me.
All i remember from that time is somethin being smashed across my face and me blackin out. A fist in my jaw and then my hair bein pulled out and somethin fallin out of my mouth.
He pulled the trigger.
I screamed as Sorcha hit the ground. Damon laughed.
"Its empty u bosh, where's my money," he said.
Sorcha got up cryin.
"Deena leave," he said, "before man decides to take u back with me."
I looked at Sorcha and kissed my teeth and then suttin hit me, how did she know about the business with my sister. I made my way to leave the room but as i did Damon grabbed me by my waist and said, "wait,"
He kissed my neck.
"Aint you goin Ryans funeral?", he askd me.
I shook my head.
"You know he was a gay bosh yeah?", he said, "he used to get lined up by old white breddas in soho for 2 bags a week,"
I looked at Sorcha, she looked away from me.
"You didnt know?", Damon laughed, "why u fink he set up Diane, she wanted a piece of that dough and he werent givin her none so she started runnin her mouf,"
I looked up at him, "please let me go," i said.
"Sorcha wheres my money," he asked her.
She pointed to bag, "you were gonna run wiv it," he laufed.
He picked up the bag and said, "alright girls ill be on my-" then he looked at my tits and licked them, "you know what," he said, "i dont feel like goin."
I looked at Sorcha, "Us three are gonna fuck, and if anyones got a problem wiv it man might just have to take out my real stap and delegate a few bullets in your pussies."
"Please no," i said.
"Sorcha come ere,"he said.
He was sexy, but my body was still numb, my pussy had stopped hurtin but i was still upset about everythin. Sorcha walked toward us.
"Lips her,"
I looked at him and said, "no please,"
I was so shocked about what i had just found out about Ryan that my whole mind was a mess.
"Lips her,"
Sorcha slowly grabbed my face and kissed me.
At first if felt weird but then my pussy got wet and then i started rollin my tongue around her mouth as we rubbed tits togehter, i was jus doin dis so Damon would leave me alone, the second i had the oppurtunity i was gonna duss.
"lets go the room," damon said.
I looked at Sorcha, she was cryin, she had nuthin, no money, no passport, no ticket to france, no adam. The three of us went up into the room.
As we walked in, i noticed the key to Sorcha's room on the floor, i slyly acted like i had to scratch my foot, i put the key in my jeans pocket.
he lay on sorchas bed.
"ur both gonna suck my dick,"
He pulled off his jeans, took off his ed hardy tshirt and pulled down his boxers. His dick was harder than a day in Wiley's career. Sorcha looked at me as if to say play along so I did, we both took off ourclothes , my tits were still in pain as me and sorcha leaned over the dick and started lips with the dick in between our mouths.
We were both lipsin the dick, my mouth was over the dick and sorchas tongue was runnin up and down the dick as damon squeezed both our asses.
I was so horny, it felt bare wrong, i sucked the dick so hard, he was playin with my pussy, it felt kind of nice to have soft hands there, i was tryin to block out the image of all the tings i had seen, what happened to me at that party, the whole shit with smurkz and then ryan and then icey, all of it.
Damons eys were closed and then he'd open them for a bit like he couldnt believe it was really happenin, Sorcha licked my lips and pulled the dick out of my mouth, she sucked it for a bit and then held it to my lips, i sucked it whilst she was holdin it in her hand.
The dick tasted so clean, i didnt wanna stop suckin it, i was getting lightheaded as i sucked it, my pussy started gettin so moist then it made that sound whenever my thighs rubbed together, Sorcha started bashin him off into my mouth. I sucked the top, licked the tip and then slowly deepthroated it, his body tightened up and he clenched his fists.
"AAAAAAAH," he camein my mouth.
Sticky.
When i opened my mouth his cum ran down my lips, Sorcha leaned over and kissed me sucking the cum out of my mouth, lickin it off my lips.
Then as she did it, I said, "you lot wait here, lemme go take a piss and ill be right back."
Sorcha tried to come with me but damon said, "nah i dont trust u sorcha- ull try and run ,"
I put on my clothes and left the room, i shut the door behind me an dkissed my teeth, I locked those fuckers in.
I heard Damon bangin at the door tellin me to unlock it, I ran to the toilet, flushed the key and left the house.
I didnt even know what i was gonna do, where i was gonna go and then somethin hit me, I needed to find out who my sister was, I needed to go back to the Church to see the Priest.
I walked to the church and when I got there, I couldnt believe it. They were havin a funeral.
Ryans funeral.
Chapter 69
I couldnt believe it, people were leavin and goin into the cars, I saw Sorcha's mum and she walked up to me and hugged me, "Oh deena, you're too late, he's already been cremated."
I looked at her, "cremated?". And then something hit me, Diane and Ryans baby had no parents, Diane and Ryan were dead. I started cryin a bit.
She started cryin and got into acar and then I saw Paula with her mum, she looked at me and turned away. Then i saw the Priest, i had to talk to him, i walked into the empty chair to follow him, i followed him down the stairs which led to the church hall but then i lost him, there was bare mess, i think everyone was on their way to ryans parents house, i was crying and then i saw two people rush into the toilets.
I walked into the toilets, it was a proper big church, the toilets were like the ones in school.
I walked into the toilet to see who it was, there were two people in the cubicle and i recognised one of the voices. I went into the cubicle next to it and pressed my ear to the other cubicle. It was two people- fuckin.
Then i knew who one of the people was, it was Ryans dad.
He was bangin someone, and then he said suttin, "What did the Bible Basherwant to talk to you about, is it about what you know about Deena,"
And just as the person was gonna reply, i think ryans dad phone rang and then i heard him the cubicle and rush out of the toilets and then the prson he was with left too.
Who was he with? And what did that person know about me.
I walked out of the toilets to see what i could see and then all i saw was the Priest walkin into the hall dryin his eyes.
I walke dto him.
He looked at me
"Deena,"
"I need to know somethin,"i said.
"Deena this isn the place, ive just had to conduct a funeral for a young lad,".
"Its about the picture u gave me," i said, "how do u knw the baby was a girl?".
"Because it was wearin pink and the name of course."
OMFG. WHY DIDNT I THINK OF THAT BEFORE- If i just asked him for the name that he christend, it would help me find out who my sister was.
"Well, it was an African name, it sounded feminine," the priest said. "ive forgotten what it was,"
"Dont u keep it in record," i asked.
"Deena," he said, "you need to let this go, you dont need all this pressure and upsetness, ve just had to cremate a boy who was stabbed by a thug with no morals, lifes too short to worry about silly things."
"ITS NOT SILLY!," i screamed, "I need to KNOW who my sister is."
"The best person you can speak to is your mother," he said, "she'll have your answers."
He looked at me like he felt sorry for me, I told him to suck out and then I left.
I was so upset, I just started cryin because I realized how fucked up shit was. Ryan.
There were pictures of him all around the church from when he was little, in his uniform, playin football and that.
I left the church and then i saw Ryans dad in the car park withhis head on the wheel cryn.
I knocked on the car window, he looked up at me and rolled down the windows.
"Can i get in," i said.
he didnt say anythin and he opened the car door for me.
I got in and looked at him, he looked an older Ryan and a bit like Sorcha.
"Im sorry," i said, "about ryan."
He started bawlin, "I fucked up with him, i really fucked up,"
I rested my hand on his knee, "lets go somewhere private," i said.
He looked at me and put the key in the ignition and drove out of the car park.
We were headin to East
"Why did u have the funeral in south london," i asked.
"My aunt Shirley's friend Ethel arranges the flowers for the Church and so she helped arrange it," he said cryin.
I didnt even know why i was in his car but i felt safe with him, he was proper big, like he looked like griminal if he was 35 and was on weights.
We got to some house.
"Wheres everyone else," i asked.
"My aunt Shirleys in Brixton, they wont care about where i am- everyones thinkin the same thing,".
"what," i asked.
"that its my fault he's dead," he said, "that if i had been there for him as his dad he wouldnt have gotten into this mess."
I felt so guilty, i wanted to tell him what I knew but i need suttin from him and i knew how i was gonna get it.
We walked into the house.
It was so big, but it was dirty.
He was in a black suit.
"You wanna drink?", he asked.
I shook my head, he walked into the kitchen and came out with what looked like Rum.
"You're a nice girl Deena- what were u doin with a boy like ryan," he asked sippin his glass.
"I loved him," i said.
He sniggered, "Youts talkin about love."
I didnt say anythin and then he said, "im sorry- listen take a seat."
I sat down, i couldnt believe this was sorchas uncle, paulas dad, ryans dad, michelles uncle, the man rochelle grew up believin was her uncle. He was big, his shirt was off now, he was startin to remind me of natalies dad.
"I know your mum," he said sippin his rum.
"You do?", i asked.
He smiled and said, "your mum was my first,".
I froze.
"Your mum could suck dick like her life depended on it- i know tings about ur mum that u dont,"
I wanted to cry but i said, "where did u meet her,"
"Party- 1988, we were both 14, i didnt even know who she was and i fucked the shit out of her in your grandmothers bed,".
He was drunk but i could tell he wasnt lyin, "you know how i found out ryan was fuckin with u?", he asked, "Sorcha, she knew i used to fuck wit ur mudda, i tell sorcha everythin."
He was soundin like he was five, "this house- is where i came when i left ryans mum, i used to fuck so much pussy on this couch, whilst ryan was bein the man of the house lookin after his mum and sister and here i was, fuckin pussy like my life depended on it," he started cryin and then he said, "ryan my boy."
"The police dont care about who killed him cos he was in trouble with them himself apparently, so they just see it as black on black i dont see it like that- i see him as my son," he was screamin and cryin now.
"You know somethin about me," i said.
He looked at me and froze, "i heard you tell someone today that- the person knows somethin about me and you do too."
"Come ere," he said.
I looked at him for a bit and got up slowly, i walked over to him.
He touched my tit with the back of his hand, "be nice to me," he slurred, "and ill tell you what your mum told me."
I kissed him, he tasted of ryan.
I kissed his neck. ryan.
the hands. ryan.
the chest. ryan.
the dick. ryan.
I cried as he flipped me on my back and pulled off my clothes, in my head it was ryan, i held onto him so tight, i felt his dick against my pussy, his tongue against my neck. Ryan.
It was Ryan fuckin my wet cunt, it was ryans dick slidin in and out of me lickin my neck. It was Ryans who hench body was on top of mine givin me the bang, his thick dick strokin every inch of my throbbin pussy, every inch of it in me, "Ryan."
I scratched his back and blew in his hear, he fucked me even harder. Ryan, ryan all over again on top of me, dick in my pussy, tongue in my mouth.
"AAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAAAA RYAN!".
I trembled and came.
I cried out with my hands wrapped around Ryans neck and then he spoke, and it wasnt Ryan, it was his dad and i started cryin again.
His dad got off of me and fell on his back, we were on the floor lyin next to each other pantin.
"You're not your mums first born," he slurred.
"Who is it," i asked.
"I dont know," he said.
"You do," i cried, "please tell me, i know who killed Ryan, tell me and il tell you."
He slowly got up and said, "YOU WHAT."
I jumped up and said, "i know who killed ryan, tell me who my-" He punched me.
All i remember from that time is somethin being smashed across my face and me blackin out. A fist in my jaw and then my hair bein pulled out and somethin fallin out of my mouth.
CHAPTER 68 part 1.
"Your sister is...."
"Who,who!".
"My pussy!", she smacked around the head, i screamed as she tried to tear the euro ticket from my hand.
My head was throbbin, i backhanded her.
She fell on the chair.
I held the ticket high, "why the fuck do you need to jack my id to leave the country,"
She looked at me, "Deena please gimme the ticket."
I stepped back, "nah nah," i said, "u tore that picture knowin how much it means to me,"
"Please Deena, i need to leave,"
Then she looked at me and said, "what happpend 2 u when u left me here,"
I kissed my teeth, "shut up,"
"Deena please- I need to leave,"
"With Adam?", i asked
She looked away.
"He loves me innit," she said.
"U set ur owncousin to get shanked and then u try run away on his funeral,"
"SHUT UP!", she said, "You are the dumbest bosh Ive ever met in my life, Ryan tried to kill me, he tried to kill Diane, he almost killed you, he snitched on Fumez, he fucked u up multiple times and ur still dangling on his sack, eediat eediat!".
"Why would Ryan wanna kill you and Diane, diane's his baby mum, she was his youts mum."
"Two words, Ryan is a bosh!". she said.
"What r u talkin about?".
"You know what you are Deena- you're one of them girls who couldn't take a hint even if it took a shit on your headpiece, Ryan used to do some tings tht he didnt want anyone to know about- some tings he could get killed for and Diane found out and toldsomeone and I told someone else, then ryan found out- I dont know how he did it- but he must have known me an diane were gonna so shot at that house cos i know he arranged for both of us to be killed, he set up the mum of his son to be killed and now there's a boy who'll forget his mums voice because of Ryan, he aint no hero Deena, he isn't Gandhi or Marvin X, he aint no civil rights leader, he was a prick, a pussyhole pansexual prick, dats why i dont give a shit deena and u shldnt either."
"You're lyin, ryan wouldnt do that,"
"COUNT YOUR FUCKIN BLESSINS DEENA! If Ryan was still alive, he'd be beating u up everyday, he never loved u, noones ever loved u, ur dad dont want u, ur mum didnt want u, ur nans a tief, ur own uncle fucked u and the only guy who ever treated you good is in love with me, how do you feel babes, how do you feel?".
I started cryin.
"You know what," she laufed, "if u fixed up again like you used to you could easily be a light skin Lola Monroe, now you look like a tramp."
She slapped me, "and you're a pussy too,"
She took the ticket from my hand, i just cried, "now leave my yard," she said.
I went to leave and then turned to her and said, "Just one thing before I go,"
"What"
I took her fake passport t and Adams passport from out of my hand and tore out every single page. She screamed.
"how are u gonna travel without a passport?".
I threw the pages down to the floor.
She started cryin, "u bitch!"
She tried to pick up the pages as she cried,
"Too bad," i said, "now ur stuck, u see how annoying it is when someone keeps blockin your progress- u see what its like when someone keeps tryna hold u back,thats all u ever did to me, so now ill do it to you, your stuck."
She started having a panic attack. "Deena i need to leave now- I cant stay- please, help me."
"Look at you," i said, "you'd set up your own mum if it paid the rent,"
She ran to the curtains and closed them.
"They're gonna get me," she cried.
"Who's gonna get u,"
"Deena please help me- I'm pregnant with Adams baby."
I looked at her and kissed my teeth, i wanted to cry.
"Wow!", i said, "i wonder how that happened."
"Deena- i need to get out the endz now, if i don't they're gonna get me."
"Whos gonna get u,".
Then all of a sudden I heard the backdoor get kicked in.
I screamed.
They walked into the room, Sorcha sobbed.
"Oh shit, Deena, we didnt know you'd be here?"
"Please leave me alone,"Sorcha cried.
"U try boops us out 2 bags and fink we're lettin u get away with it."
Then Damon pulled out his strap and pulled the trigger.
"Who,who!".
"My pussy!", she smacked around the head, i screamed as she tried to tear the euro ticket from my hand.
My head was throbbin, i backhanded her.
She fell on the chair.
I held the ticket high, "why the fuck do you need to jack my id to leave the country,"
She looked at me, "Deena please gimme the ticket."
I stepped back, "nah nah," i said, "u tore that picture knowin how much it means to me,"
"Please Deena, i need to leave,"
Then she looked at me and said, "what happpend 2 u when u left me here,"
I kissed my teeth, "shut up,"
"Deena please- I need to leave,"
"With Adam?", i asked
She looked away.
"He loves me innit," she said.
"U set ur owncousin to get shanked and then u try run away on his funeral,"
"SHUT UP!", she said, "You are the dumbest bosh Ive ever met in my life, Ryan tried to kill me, he tried to kill Diane, he almost killed you, he snitched on Fumez, he fucked u up multiple times and ur still dangling on his sack, eediat eediat!".
"Why would Ryan wanna kill you and Diane, diane's his baby mum, she was his youts mum."
"Two words, Ryan is a bosh!". she said.
"What r u talkin about?".
"You know what you are Deena- you're one of them girls who couldn't take a hint even if it took a shit on your headpiece, Ryan used to do some tings tht he didnt want anyone to know about- some tings he could get killed for and Diane found out and toldsomeone and I told someone else, then ryan found out- I dont know how he did it- but he must have known me an diane were gonna so shot at that house cos i know he arranged for both of us to be killed, he set up the mum of his son to be killed and now there's a boy who'll forget his mums voice because of Ryan, he aint no hero Deena, he isn't Gandhi or Marvin X, he aint no civil rights leader, he was a prick, a pussyhole pansexual prick, dats why i dont give a shit deena and u shldnt either."
"You're lyin, ryan wouldnt do that,"
"COUNT YOUR FUCKIN BLESSINS DEENA! If Ryan was still alive, he'd be beating u up everyday, he never loved u, noones ever loved u, ur dad dont want u, ur mum didnt want u, ur nans a tief, ur own uncle fucked u and the only guy who ever treated you good is in love with me, how do you feel babes, how do you feel?".
I started cryin.
"You know what," she laufed, "if u fixed up again like you used to you could easily be a light skin Lola Monroe, now you look like a tramp."
She slapped me, "and you're a pussy too,"
She took the ticket from my hand, i just cried, "now leave my yard," she said.
I went to leave and then turned to her and said, "Just one thing before I go,"
"What"
I took her fake passport t and Adams passport from out of my hand and tore out every single page. She screamed.
"how are u gonna travel without a passport?".
I threw the pages down to the floor.
She started cryin, "u bitch!"
She tried to pick up the pages as she cried,
"Too bad," i said, "now ur stuck, u see how annoying it is when someone keeps blockin your progress- u see what its like when someone keeps tryna hold u back,thats all u ever did to me, so now ill do it to you, your stuck."
She started having a panic attack. "Deena i need to leave now- I cant stay- please, help me."
"Look at you," i said, "you'd set up your own mum if it paid the rent,"
She ran to the curtains and closed them.
"They're gonna get me," she cried.
"Who's gonna get u,"
"Deena please help me- I'm pregnant with Adams baby."
I looked at her and kissed my teeth, i wanted to cry.
"Wow!", i said, "i wonder how that happened."
"Deena- i need to get out the endz now, if i don't they're gonna get me."
"Whos gonna get u,".
Then all of a sudden I heard the backdoor get kicked in.
I screamed.
They walked into the room, Sorcha sobbed.
"Oh shit, Deena, we didnt know you'd be here?"
"Please leave me alone,"Sorcha cried.
"U try boops us out 2 bags and fink we're lettin u get away with it."
Then Damon pulled out his strap and pulled the trigger.
Wednesday, 26 May 2010
CHAPTER 66/67
"I dont care," i said.
I tore both of the tickets. I tore up his ticket.
He screamed and ran to me, he slapped me.
I kickd him in the balls, grabbed a lamp and smashed it over his head. He fell on the floor and I ran out with his passport, sorchas fake passport and sorcha's eurostar ticket and forty pounds that was lyin on the desk.
I ran out of the house. These times it was 12.30, it was raining so hard, i looked so rank, my pussy was still sore but the rest of my body was beginning to feel better.
I ran into some shop and begged them to let me call use their phone to call a cab, i was cryin. They let me use their phone and i used one of the local cab services.
I waited for the cab and just as i got in, i saw adam runnin towards me, i jumped in, shut the door and told the driver to take me back to my house, I needed to see my mum.
As the cab left Adams street, i saw him runnin behind it runnin towards me cryin in the rain. I knew that was the last time i was gonna see him.
The cab driver said, "rough night?".
I nodded, then he looked at the passports and ticket in my hand, the money was in my pocket, "You goin abroad?", he asked.
"Yeah," i said, "Yeah I am,"
The car stopped outside my house and the cab fare came to 60, but i speeched the driver to allow me, so he accepted 40.
I knocked on the door.
"Grandma?."
She pulled me in and hugged me so tight. She looked at me and cried, "Deena what happend to you,"
"You're back?", i cried huggin her.
"Come to the front room," she said.
When i walked in there, it was fucked up, everythin was smashed. i started cryin, "what happened?", i asked.
"Your mother," she said, "I- came back and she did this, Deena I..."
She looked at me, "Deena, there's something you need to know, and I want to tell you dis in a way that will help you to understand because if you see your mother and she tells you- she'll say it out of spite."
We sat on the sofa.
"When she was about 16,your mum got pregnant with Ethel's son, and we never told Ethel or her son that it was his baby and erm, she had it and gave birth to it, and we christened it and we- your mother she was goin on wild, different man everyday in her room, everyday calls from the school about her fighting with other girls, she started doin things- and expectin me to look after her baby, the 3 month baby and I told her that i couldnt look after her yout for her and that if she didn't sort herself out, i would give it up for adoption, she moved out with the baby, moved in with some Jamaican boy and i didnt see her for a month, when i found her address come to find out the boy lef her and she was squattin in the place, no lights, no electricity, no nothin and when i looked at the baby i saw cuts on its arms, she had tried to kill it and so i did- what i thought was best and i took that baby to Barbados to give to Mable's mother to look after, then she died a year after i gave the baby to her, when i went to back home for the funeral and to bring the baby back because your mother had sorted herself out, Mable's stupid father tell me give the baby awayto a friend, i was so hurt, i never cried so much and i told your mother when i got back to London that her baby was dead, then a year later she had you and you made everytin alright, two years later I tell Ethel about everytin and the bitch tells me she knows who has the baby, she knows who raised it, she tells me that she'll tellme if i give her money, so i lied to you- about the mortgage, it was the only way, come to find Ethel was lyin like a dog- she didnt know shit, all the while your mothers been thinkin her baby died many years ago, then last week I came back from Barbados when your mother told me that Mable called and told her the truth- that her baby was alive and that her father had just given it away," then my nan started cryin, "then she did all dis."
CHAPTER 67
The tv was smashed up, everyfin was fucked up.
I just looked at her, "was it a boy or a girl?", i asked.
"Boy," my nan said, "a baby boy,"
I got up slowly, "where are u goin," she asked cryin.
"To shower,".
I walked up the stairs and took off the dirty clothes and got in the shower and sobbed, why was she lyin to me- the baby in the picture was a girl, it was wearin a pink dress, ithad long eye lashes, curly hair, it was a girl, it looked a dark skin me.
I got out of the shower and walked into my room, i put on high waisted jeans, a blue and white striped vest top, i tucked the top into the jeans and put on blue airforces.
i brushed my hair back and put it in a high ponytail.
I put the passports in a clutch bag along with sorcha's ticket and put on a blazer to hide the bruises on my arm.
I walked down the stairs and walked into the front room, "grandma- tell me the truth," i said, "was the baby a boy or girl?",
"it was a boy," she said, "why do u ask, deena why ur face so swell up, someone beat u?."
"Nan, if im not back in the hour, please dont bother ever calling or talking to me again, you and my mum are both dutty stinkin liars,"
Then i left.
I cried, i wiped my tears as i knocked on Sorcha's front door,
She answered it.
She tried to slam the door in my face, i kicked it back and walked into her house, i locked the door behind me. there were two suitcases lyin in the corridor. I looked on the floor, there was a leaflet, for Ryans funeral, it was today, at 3.
"HELLO!", i called to see if anyone else was home, when nobody replied, I looked at her and said, "wheres the picture i left here."
She gave me a blank stare.
She walked into the front room and picked up the picture, "you mean this?", she asked.
"Give it to me," i said.
She lifted it up and tore it into two and threw it on the floor.
I didnt scream, i didnt cry, i wanted to though.
"You're running away on the day of Ryan's funeral," i asked, "what a bitch."
She looked shocked, "how the fuck do you-"
Then i pulled out her Eurostar ticket.
I could tell she wanted to scream.
"Dont do it please- dont tear it," she said.
"Why not," i asked tryin not to cry about the picture she tore.
"Iknow who your sister is," she said, "Its...."
I tore both of the tickets. I tore up his ticket.
He screamed and ran to me, he slapped me.
I kickd him in the balls, grabbed a lamp and smashed it over his head. He fell on the floor and I ran out with his passport, sorchas fake passport and sorcha's eurostar ticket and forty pounds that was lyin on the desk.
I ran out of the house. These times it was 12.30, it was raining so hard, i looked so rank, my pussy was still sore but the rest of my body was beginning to feel better.
I ran into some shop and begged them to let me call use their phone to call a cab, i was cryin. They let me use their phone and i used one of the local cab services.
I waited for the cab and just as i got in, i saw adam runnin towards me, i jumped in, shut the door and told the driver to take me back to my house, I needed to see my mum.
As the cab left Adams street, i saw him runnin behind it runnin towards me cryin in the rain. I knew that was the last time i was gonna see him.
The cab driver said, "rough night?".
I nodded, then he looked at the passports and ticket in my hand, the money was in my pocket, "You goin abroad?", he asked.
"Yeah," i said, "Yeah I am,"
The car stopped outside my house and the cab fare came to 60, but i speeched the driver to allow me, so he accepted 40.
I knocked on the door.
"Grandma?."
She pulled me in and hugged me so tight. She looked at me and cried, "Deena what happend to you,"
"You're back?", i cried huggin her.
"Come to the front room," she said.
When i walked in there, it was fucked up, everythin was smashed. i started cryin, "what happened?", i asked.
"Your mother," she said, "I- came back and she did this, Deena I..."
She looked at me, "Deena, there's something you need to know, and I want to tell you dis in a way that will help you to understand because if you see your mother and she tells you- she'll say it out of spite."
We sat on the sofa.
"When she was about 16,your mum got pregnant with Ethel's son, and we never told Ethel or her son that it was his baby and erm, she had it and gave birth to it, and we christened it and we- your mother she was goin on wild, different man everyday in her room, everyday calls from the school about her fighting with other girls, she started doin things- and expectin me to look after her baby, the 3 month baby and I told her that i couldnt look after her yout for her and that if she didn't sort herself out, i would give it up for adoption, she moved out with the baby, moved in with some Jamaican boy and i didnt see her for a month, when i found her address come to find out the boy lef her and she was squattin in the place, no lights, no electricity, no nothin and when i looked at the baby i saw cuts on its arms, she had tried to kill it and so i did- what i thought was best and i took that baby to Barbados to give to Mable's mother to look after, then she died a year after i gave the baby to her, when i went to back home for the funeral and to bring the baby back because your mother had sorted herself out, Mable's stupid father tell me give the baby awayto a friend, i was so hurt, i never cried so much and i told your mother when i got back to London that her baby was dead, then a year later she had you and you made everytin alright, two years later I tell Ethel about everytin and the bitch tells me she knows who has the baby, she knows who raised it, she tells me that she'll tellme if i give her money, so i lied to you- about the mortgage, it was the only way, come to find Ethel was lyin like a dog- she didnt know shit, all the while your mothers been thinkin her baby died many years ago, then last week I came back from Barbados when your mother told me that Mable called and told her the truth- that her baby was alive and that her father had just given it away," then my nan started cryin, "then she did all dis."
CHAPTER 67
The tv was smashed up, everyfin was fucked up.
I just looked at her, "was it a boy or a girl?", i asked.
"Boy," my nan said, "a baby boy,"
I got up slowly, "where are u goin," she asked cryin.
"To shower,".
I walked up the stairs and took off the dirty clothes and got in the shower and sobbed, why was she lyin to me- the baby in the picture was a girl, it was wearin a pink dress, ithad long eye lashes, curly hair, it was a girl, it looked a dark skin me.
I got out of the shower and walked into my room, i put on high waisted jeans, a blue and white striped vest top, i tucked the top into the jeans and put on blue airforces.
i brushed my hair back and put it in a high ponytail.
I put the passports in a clutch bag along with sorcha's ticket and put on a blazer to hide the bruises on my arm.
I walked down the stairs and walked into the front room, "grandma- tell me the truth," i said, "was the baby a boy or girl?",
"it was a boy," she said, "why do u ask, deena why ur face so swell up, someone beat u?."
"Nan, if im not back in the hour, please dont bother ever calling or talking to me again, you and my mum are both dutty stinkin liars,"
Then i left.
I cried, i wiped my tears as i knocked on Sorcha's front door,
She answered it.
She tried to slam the door in my face, i kicked it back and walked into her house, i locked the door behind me. there were two suitcases lyin in the corridor. I looked on the floor, there was a leaflet, for Ryans funeral, it was today, at 3.
"HELLO!", i called to see if anyone else was home, when nobody replied, I looked at her and said, "wheres the picture i left here."
She gave me a blank stare.
She walked into the front room and picked up the picture, "you mean this?", she asked.
"Give it to me," i said.
She lifted it up and tore it into two and threw it on the floor.
I didnt scream, i didnt cry, i wanted to though.
"You're running away on the day of Ryan's funeral," i asked, "what a bitch."
She looked shocked, "how the fuck do you-"
Then i pulled out her Eurostar ticket.
I could tell she wanted to scream.
"Dont do it please- dont tear it," she said.
"Why not," i asked tryin not to cry about the picture she tore.
"Iknow who your sister is," she said, "Its...."
DEENA SKET CHAPTER 64 and 65
I looked up at Adam.
he fell on his back next to me, my pussy hurt so much, i didnt say anythin,
"why did u hurt me,"
"what"
"why did u hit me?".
"i told u i was sorry,"
"then why did u do it again,"
"i only did it once," he said getting up.
I got up slowly and looked at him.
He couldnt look at my face, even though the bruises werent that obvious from eveything that had happened the night before, the swellin was there. "Ive got HIV," I said.
He stared at me and slowly shook his head.
"And you just fucked me bareback," i said.
His eyes started to water up.
"You're lying,"
"Where did you ask the cab to pick me up from- a hospital, why do u think i was there,".
He said, "you're chattin shit."
"Ive got HIV," i said. "I bet you wished you used a rubber now"
He went to punch me but then stopped, "you're lyin, show me the results."
I pointed at my pussy, "this is the result,"
He screamed and grabbed hold of my neck, "what good is fuckin me up gonna do- im fucked up as it its," i said.
"you're chattin shit," he said walking backwards awayfrom me.
Then i noticed something, there were two suitcases underneath the window.
There was a passport and two airline tickets on the desk next to me
"You're tryna run away," i said, "before the feds start to ask you questions about ryan,"
He went to come near me but i picked the passport up, "ill tear out every single page if u come any closer,"
I picked up the airline tickets and realized they weren't airline tickets, they were Eurostar.
I opened them.
There was one for Adam and one for..
Me.
CHAPTER 65
I picked up the second passport I looked closely at the pic, it had my name on the picture. But Sorchas face.
"What the FUCK IS THIS,!" I screamed.
He gave me a blank stare like say I had just told him Roll Deep that if you took the chorus out of Roll Deep's new song, the song would slip down the charts faster than you can say "Channel Aka".
"You and that bitch," i said, "you're running away- together, tryin to use my identity."
He went to come close to me but i said, "come any closer and ill tear that shit up,"
he backed away.
"You wanna try and get away from what uve done, from killing my man,".
"IT WAS SMURKZ."
"Oh i aint worried about Smurkz," i said, "he was nabbed this morning, drug raid."
Adam looked horrified, "so is sorcha on her way den," i asked.
He didnt say anythin.
"If u dont answer me, ill tear it up," i said.
"ur chattin shit about the hiv," he said.
"maybe i am, either way im not lettin u duss from what uve done, and that bosh too, is she on her way,"
"shes meeting me at st pancras in two hours," he said.
"So she's gonna leave her maj to go france wiv u, why u scared," i said.
"cos i cant go pen for what me sorcha and smurkz did,"
"and now you know smurkz will snitch cos ive just told u the feds have got him, so now these tickets mean more than what they did five minutes ago and that bosh is tryin to use my name to get out of the country yeah?," i said.
"Please Deena, let me go," he said startin to cry, "u hated ryan yourself."
"SHUT UP,"
"He fucked u up, sorcha told me how he didnt even care when u got raped by jesse and faisani, how he's the reason you had a miscarriage and ur angry at someone for duppying him after all he did to you," Adam shouted.
"He loved me,"
"There's tings u dont know about him, Deena, tings that he did."
"Like what, how would you know, you - you only saw him once,"
"There's shit that he did that you dont know about, that Sorcha doesnt even know about,"
"Tell me then you fassy- tell me what you know!".
"HE KILLED DIANE!".
he fell on his back next to me, my pussy hurt so much, i didnt say anythin,
"why did u hurt me,"
"what"
"why did u hit me?".
"i told u i was sorry,"
"then why did u do it again,"
"i only did it once," he said getting up.
I got up slowly and looked at him.
He couldnt look at my face, even though the bruises werent that obvious from eveything that had happened the night before, the swellin was there. "Ive got HIV," I said.
He stared at me and slowly shook his head.
"And you just fucked me bareback," i said.
His eyes started to water up.
"You're lying,"
"Where did you ask the cab to pick me up from- a hospital, why do u think i was there,".
He said, "you're chattin shit."
"Ive got HIV," i said. "I bet you wished you used a rubber now"
He went to punch me but then stopped, "you're lyin, show me the results."
I pointed at my pussy, "this is the result,"
He screamed and grabbed hold of my neck, "what good is fuckin me up gonna do- im fucked up as it its," i said.
"you're chattin shit," he said walking backwards awayfrom me.
Then i noticed something, there were two suitcases underneath the window.
There was a passport and two airline tickets on the desk next to me
"You're tryna run away," i said, "before the feds start to ask you questions about ryan,"
He went to come near me but i picked the passport up, "ill tear out every single page if u come any closer,"
I picked up the airline tickets and realized they weren't airline tickets, they were Eurostar.
I opened them.
There was one for Adam and one for..
Me.
CHAPTER 65
I picked up the second passport I looked closely at the pic, it had my name on the picture. But Sorchas face.
"What the FUCK IS THIS,!" I screamed.
He gave me a blank stare like say I had just told him Roll Deep that if you took the chorus out of Roll Deep's new song, the song would slip down the charts faster than you can say "Channel Aka".
"You and that bitch," i said, "you're running away- together, tryin to use my identity."
He went to come close to me but i said, "come any closer and ill tear that shit up,"
he backed away.
"You wanna try and get away from what uve done, from killing my man,".
"IT WAS SMURKZ."
"Oh i aint worried about Smurkz," i said, "he was nabbed this morning, drug raid."
Adam looked horrified, "so is sorcha on her way den," i asked.
He didnt say anythin.
"If u dont answer me, ill tear it up," i said.
"ur chattin shit about the hiv," he said.
"maybe i am, either way im not lettin u duss from what uve done, and that bosh too, is she on her way,"
"shes meeting me at st pancras in two hours," he said.
"So she's gonna leave her maj to go france wiv u, why u scared," i said.
"cos i cant go pen for what me sorcha and smurkz did,"
"and now you know smurkz will snitch cos ive just told u the feds have got him, so now these tickets mean more than what they did five minutes ago and that bosh is tryin to use my name to get out of the country yeah?," i said.
"Please Deena, let me go," he said startin to cry, "u hated ryan yourself."
"SHUT UP,"
"He fucked u up, sorcha told me how he didnt even care when u got raped by jesse and faisani, how he's the reason you had a miscarriage and ur angry at someone for duppying him after all he did to you," Adam shouted.
"He loved me,"
"There's tings u dont know about him, Deena, tings that he did."
"Like what, how would you know, you - you only saw him once,"
"There's shit that he did that you dont know about, that Sorcha doesnt even know about,"
"Tell me then you fassy- tell me what you know!".
"HE KILLED DIANE!".
Monday, 24 May 2010
DEENA SKET CHAPTER 63
"Your father's wife," she said, "I know exactly who you are,"
This was too much, I just started cryin thinkin about ryan.
"look at you, as much of a whore as your mother," she said.
I looked up at her and said, "please, ill go to another doctor."
She walked to the door and lockd it.
"You think you can ruin my family," she said, "you think my husband loves you more than me."
"Why are you angry at me for what YOUR husband did with my mum," i said.
She went to slap me but i grabbed her hand, "if your husband loved you he wouldnt have cheated," i said, "fuckin hypocrite." I was ill, i was sick but i was so angry, like i was drawin my stregnth from how pissed off and hurt i was.
"Look at you," she said, "you're worse than those tramps and you have the audacity to share the same gene pool as my family,"
"And what family is that?", i asked, "dont mek me tell u about yourself zainab, faisani is a sick pervert, your husband is unfaithful yet you fink ur shit doesnt stink, keep on believin being a loyal wife will make him love u, my mum wasnt the first woman he cheated on u with and she sure as fuck isnt the last, look at you- big ass doctor tryin to come for a girl like me when ive come to you for help, i didnt even know who u were, but now im seein ur face i can understand why he went fuckin elsewhere,".
She slapped me, the pain in my face hurt so much, "It's your husband you should slap, not me."
"get out,"
"im going to get tested," i said, "and ur goin to make sure I do- cos i you dont, ill make a scene right here and now, how would your friends down at the mosque feel if they knew that your husband who claims to be a devout muslim had an affair with a black woman and has a child with her,".
She looked at me and then left the room.
I just cried.
You know that feeling when everythin feels like whats the point. All i could think about was the last time I saw Ryan, when we had that fight cos of adam, how everyfin just got fucked up.
I swear, for the first time I missed Natalie so much, like i wish i could call her up and tell her everyfin. Noone else knew about dis, but two years ago i got jacked by some girls in East, i got proper fucked up by them because I must have given one of dem a dirty look and as soon as i told Natalie, she took me out to Tinsel Town and we spent the whole day, watchin dvds, doin homework and for the first time in my life i had been happy.
You know that feelin when u stop in the middle of a moment and just smile, thats how it was with Natalie, and like she was the first person that i proper liked, that i could trust, she used to call me up to tell me if we had any homework when i missed school and when.. Pearl walked back in.
"Deena, you ready for your test?", she said.
I nodded.
When she finished with all the STI tests she looked at me and said, "Deena- no matter what the test results say, you have to go on livin ur life, " she looked at me and said, "I'm HIV positive Deena."
I looked up at her and was so shockd.
"Ive been HIV positive for 25 years," she said. She looked bare healthy tho, like u would never think.
"How did u get it i asked?".
She made that hmmp sound black woman make when somethins sad.
"My boyfriend," she said, "Leroy, he was my baby father and everytime i wanted to talk about marriage he would say no no- theres no need- no need- and me like a fool i kept fuckin him, we had a flat together in Elephant and Castle, and uno he was a looker, smooth talker, uno he was so attractive that i let so many tings slide, like how everyweek girls would call the housephone lookin for him, how he would spend all day bunnin and when he wasnt bunnin he wasnt doin anytin productive- and i was still fuckin him, and i thought he would never cheat on me, because i thought wehave a baby together, and hes livin with me and uno he calls me his wife- so he wouldnt cheat, i didnt fink i needed to use a condom because of course im tinkin im the only one, and the problem with men is that they're good liars, when they tell u theyre not fuckin about with other bitches you believe them because YOU WANT to believe it you know, anyway, ill never forget it, it was carnival- 1985 and it was the Monday one and I was wit my sister and a girl walked up to me, i was dancin, imagin me dressed like sometin out of a salt and pepper video, and i was dancin next to a float and a girl, tall coolie girl walks up to me and tells me that my man- my Leroy gave her sister HIV, and i ignored her because in my head Leroy would never cheat and so uno what i did,"
I looked at her. She continued.
"I went back home and didnt tell my sister what the girl said to me, i just went home and saw him,he was with his friends bunnin in the balcony and that nite when we were alone i told him i wanted to fuck with him a condom from then on, LIKE A FOOL- i was too afraid to confront him about it, and after a few fucks he convinced me to stop makin him wearin the rubber and i let him continue to fuck me bareback, a year later i got pregnant and the doctors tell me that me and the baby hiv positive." A tear ran down her eye.
"Imagine this Deena, young girl like me, no more than 23 years old, been in this country no longer than 5 years with a baby in my house and a baby with hiv in my stomach, i aborted the baby and i took my son and i left Leroy, luckily for me they spotted it early, they gave me the medications and ive been takin them everyday for all these years, come to find out last year that Leroy has a son the same age as my son and a daughter who was born the same month as my yout was due, he died last year, went to his funeral and i cried like a baby," she started laughin, but the laugh was sad.
I hugged her.
"Im gonna go now," i said.
"We can text u ur results," she said. I gave her my number as i held back my tears.
"Where are u going to go," she asked.
"There's someone i need to see," i said.
I left the room and walked out of the hospital, i was wearin jesses clothes and trainers. I knew what i was gonna do, i walked back into the hospital and asked to borrow the phone to make a quick call, i made the call and the person told me to wait outside the hospital for a cab to take me to where they wanted to meet me.
The cab came and i got in.
I cried as i sat in the back, then i wiped my tears.
"where's this goin," i asked.
"The man who called said to take u to an address in Northolt love," the cabbie said.
I nodded, the person i was gonna meet knew how risky it would be for me to be in South, I was gonna do this for Ryan.
The cab stopped outside some house and i saw him waiting there.
He walked to the cab and paid the man and looked at me as i got out of the cab.
He stared at me, "Deena what happpend to you."
"Let's just go inside innit," i said.
We walked into the house, "whose house is this," i asked.
"My dads, i knew u wouldnt wanna meet at my house or in south cos-".
I looked at him, "Deena im sorry," he said.
"Ryans dead you know," i told him.
My heart sank as i said it.
"Is there somewhere i can shower," i asked him.
He nodded and started cryin, "Deena im sorry,".
I kissed him, "its ok," i said, "im happy."
He led me to the shower,"whose clothes are those," he asked.
"Someones," i said.
As i was naked, he looked at my pussy.
He gasped,
"what happened," he askd.
I didnt say anythin and got into the dirty shower, i knew i was gonna leave it dirtier than when i got in, all i wanted is to feel water on my body.
He was watchin me shower and cryin, "when did ryan die?", he asked.
"Yesterday," i said, "lost too much blood,"
I got out of the shower and stood in front of him naked.
He looked at my face and body, "what happend to you deena."
"Men did," i said.
Then i grabbed his dick gently and kissed his neck.
"Fuck me," i whispered in his ear, "chop my backs down,"
He started bawlin, "Ryan, i didnt meet for dis to happen- i didnt know."
"Its ok," i said kissing his face, "just put ur dick in me."
He was gettin hard, he led me to one of the rooms and gently put me on the bed, i just lay there and spread my legs.
He went to put on a dom, "No," i said, "it feels better when i can feel it all."
He tore off his clothes as he was cryin and got on top of me. He put his dick in me.
I cried and started bleedin.
I screamed, it was bleedin so much, it was sore, the throbbin in my head was insane, like i'd been shot in the head.
He wiped my pussy with the dirty duvet, and said, "youve been raped."
I shook my head, "no," i said, "please go on."
"Deena u just bled ," he said.
"it wont happen again, please," i said, "do it again."
He put it in slowly, this time i didnt bleed but the pain was still there, i wanted to scream but then he would pull out and then i would have failed.
"All the way inside," i said gently.He cried as he fucked me.
"Tell me you love me," i said.
"I love you deena,".
"I love you too Adam- I love you too."
This was too much, I just started cryin thinkin about ryan.
"look at you, as much of a whore as your mother," she said.
I looked up at her and said, "please, ill go to another doctor."
She walked to the door and lockd it.
"You think you can ruin my family," she said, "you think my husband loves you more than me."
"Why are you angry at me for what YOUR husband did with my mum," i said.
She went to slap me but i grabbed her hand, "if your husband loved you he wouldnt have cheated," i said, "fuckin hypocrite." I was ill, i was sick but i was so angry, like i was drawin my stregnth from how pissed off and hurt i was.
"Look at you," she said, "you're worse than those tramps and you have the audacity to share the same gene pool as my family,"
"And what family is that?", i asked, "dont mek me tell u about yourself zainab, faisani is a sick pervert, your husband is unfaithful yet you fink ur shit doesnt stink, keep on believin being a loyal wife will make him love u, my mum wasnt the first woman he cheated on u with and she sure as fuck isnt the last, look at you- big ass doctor tryin to come for a girl like me when ive come to you for help, i didnt even know who u were, but now im seein ur face i can understand why he went fuckin elsewhere,".
She slapped me, the pain in my face hurt so much, "It's your husband you should slap, not me."
"get out,"
"im going to get tested," i said, "and ur goin to make sure I do- cos i you dont, ill make a scene right here and now, how would your friends down at the mosque feel if they knew that your husband who claims to be a devout muslim had an affair with a black woman and has a child with her,".
She looked at me and then left the room.
I just cried.
You know that feeling when everythin feels like whats the point. All i could think about was the last time I saw Ryan, when we had that fight cos of adam, how everyfin just got fucked up.
I swear, for the first time I missed Natalie so much, like i wish i could call her up and tell her everyfin. Noone else knew about dis, but two years ago i got jacked by some girls in East, i got proper fucked up by them because I must have given one of dem a dirty look and as soon as i told Natalie, she took me out to Tinsel Town and we spent the whole day, watchin dvds, doin homework and for the first time in my life i had been happy.
You know that feelin when u stop in the middle of a moment and just smile, thats how it was with Natalie, and like she was the first person that i proper liked, that i could trust, she used to call me up to tell me if we had any homework when i missed school and when.. Pearl walked back in.
"Deena, you ready for your test?", she said.
I nodded.
When she finished with all the STI tests she looked at me and said, "Deena- no matter what the test results say, you have to go on livin ur life, " she looked at me and said, "I'm HIV positive Deena."
I looked up at her and was so shockd.
"Ive been HIV positive for 25 years," she said. She looked bare healthy tho, like u would never think.
"How did u get it i asked?".
She made that hmmp sound black woman make when somethins sad.
"My boyfriend," she said, "Leroy, he was my baby father and everytime i wanted to talk about marriage he would say no no- theres no need- no need- and me like a fool i kept fuckin him, we had a flat together in Elephant and Castle, and uno he was a looker, smooth talker, uno he was so attractive that i let so many tings slide, like how everyweek girls would call the housephone lookin for him, how he would spend all day bunnin and when he wasnt bunnin he wasnt doin anytin productive- and i was still fuckin him, and i thought he would never cheat on me, because i thought wehave a baby together, and hes livin with me and uno he calls me his wife- so he wouldnt cheat, i didnt fink i needed to use a condom because of course im tinkin im the only one, and the problem with men is that they're good liars, when they tell u theyre not fuckin about with other bitches you believe them because YOU WANT to believe it you know, anyway, ill never forget it, it was carnival- 1985 and it was the Monday one and I was wit my sister and a girl walked up to me, i was dancin, imagin me dressed like sometin out of a salt and pepper video, and i was dancin next to a float and a girl, tall coolie girl walks up to me and tells me that my man- my Leroy gave her sister HIV, and i ignored her because in my head Leroy would never cheat and so uno what i did,"
I looked at her. She continued.
"I went back home and didnt tell my sister what the girl said to me, i just went home and saw him,he was with his friends bunnin in the balcony and that nite when we were alone i told him i wanted to fuck with him a condom from then on, LIKE A FOOL- i was too afraid to confront him about it, and after a few fucks he convinced me to stop makin him wearin the rubber and i let him continue to fuck me bareback, a year later i got pregnant and the doctors tell me that me and the baby hiv positive." A tear ran down her eye.
"Imagine this Deena, young girl like me, no more than 23 years old, been in this country no longer than 5 years with a baby in my house and a baby with hiv in my stomach, i aborted the baby and i took my son and i left Leroy, luckily for me they spotted it early, they gave me the medications and ive been takin them everyday for all these years, come to find out last year that Leroy has a son the same age as my son and a daughter who was born the same month as my yout was due, he died last year, went to his funeral and i cried like a baby," she started laughin, but the laugh was sad.
I hugged her.
"Im gonna go now," i said.
"We can text u ur results," she said. I gave her my number as i held back my tears.
"Where are u going to go," she asked.
"There's someone i need to see," i said.
I left the room and walked out of the hospital, i was wearin jesses clothes and trainers. I knew what i was gonna do, i walked back into the hospital and asked to borrow the phone to make a quick call, i made the call and the person told me to wait outside the hospital for a cab to take me to where they wanted to meet me.
The cab came and i got in.
I cried as i sat in the back, then i wiped my tears.
"where's this goin," i asked.
"The man who called said to take u to an address in Northolt love," the cabbie said.
I nodded, the person i was gonna meet knew how risky it would be for me to be in South, I was gonna do this for Ryan.
The cab stopped outside some house and i saw him waiting there.
He walked to the cab and paid the man and looked at me as i got out of the cab.
He stared at me, "Deena what happpend to you."
"Let's just go inside innit," i said.
We walked into the house, "whose house is this," i asked.
"My dads, i knew u wouldnt wanna meet at my house or in south cos-".
I looked at him, "Deena im sorry," he said.
"Ryans dead you know," i told him.
My heart sank as i said it.
"Is there somewhere i can shower," i asked him.
He nodded and started cryin, "Deena im sorry,".
I kissed him, "its ok," i said, "im happy."
He led me to the shower,"whose clothes are those," he asked.
"Someones," i said.
As i was naked, he looked at my pussy.
He gasped,
"what happened," he askd.
I didnt say anythin and got into the dirty shower, i knew i was gonna leave it dirtier than when i got in, all i wanted is to feel water on my body.
He was watchin me shower and cryin, "when did ryan die?", he asked.
"Yesterday," i said, "lost too much blood,"
I got out of the shower and stood in front of him naked.
He looked at my face and body, "what happend to you deena."
"Men did," i said.
Then i grabbed his dick gently and kissed his neck.
"Fuck me," i whispered in his ear, "chop my backs down,"
He started bawlin, "Ryan, i didnt meet for dis to happen- i didnt know."
"Its ok," i said kissing his face, "just put ur dick in me."
He was gettin hard, he led me to one of the rooms and gently put me on the bed, i just lay there and spread my legs.
He went to put on a dom, "No," i said, "it feels better when i can feel it all."
He tore off his clothes as he was cryin and got on top of me. He put his dick in me.
I cried and started bleedin.
I screamed, it was bleedin so much, it was sore, the throbbin in my head was insane, like i'd been shot in the head.
He wiped my pussy with the dirty duvet, and said, "youve been raped."
I shook my head, "no," i said, "please go on."
"Deena u just bled ," he said.
"it wont happen again, please," i said, "do it again."
He put it in slowly, this time i didnt bleed but the pain was still there, i wanted to scream but then he would pull out and then i would have failed.
"All the way inside," i said gently.He cried as he fucked me.
"Tell me you love me," i said.
"I love you deena,".
"I love you too Adam- I love you too."
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